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MONKEY’S BOX OF HORRORS VOL. 1 By MATT KURTZ

unnamed (1)MONKEY’S BOX OF HORRORS VOL. 1 is like reading a Tales from the Crypt comic without the illustrations. The stories in this box of horrors played out in my head in similar cinematic fashion as Trilogy of Terror or Creepshow, with short but sweet tales of horror that take up residence in your psyche.

I had first been introduced to Matt Kurtz through Strangehouse books, in their anthology, Strange Fucking Stories. His short story, WORSE FOR THE WEAR, was one of my favorites in that collection. I absolutely love that 80’s horror anthology feel I get when reading his words. It’s very visual and on point. Here is a quick review of each of the stories in his collection MONKEY’S BOX OF HORRORS VOL. 1.

INTRODUCTION: Matt Kurtz himself gives a quick intro into the world of Monkey. Honestly, the concept of a monkey dealing out a box of horrors was a bit too campy but was quicly forgiven when I read the contents. The Monkey is Kurtz’s muse and the reader’s Crypt Keeper.

BUG BOY: Stanley, or as he is known to his fellow classmates, Bug Boy, is not your average little boy. Sure he appears to be like any other little boy in love with bugs, but Stanley’s obsession leads him to the cemetery after hearing about maggots and worms feasting on a dead guy. To Stanley, nothing would be cooler than bugs who idned on real human flesh. His strange desires lead him to a nest of specimens worthy of his collection but some creatures are better left alone. This wasn’t my favorite story in this collection but Stanley’s exploration in the cemetery reminded me of the short in Trilogy of Terror where the grave robber is confronted by huge mutant rats in the grave of his target so that was worth the read.

THE THING IN THE WOODS: Everyone has fights with their parents, but sometimes one meaningless argument can make a child run away from home. Our main character does this and seeks refuge in the woods. The woods prove to be much less safe than he had previously thought. When he encounters the strange beings he was warned about, running home instead of away becomes priority. AHHH!! Probably my favorite super short myth tale ever! Kurtz’s writing style is so amazing at painting a perfectly good outline and picture of how things are going to work out and then, at the very end, he switches it on you and it’s not what you think! Super adorable story.

THE MAN: Bill is just your run of the mill family guy. He has a beautiful wife and two wonderful little boys that he loves with all his heart. But kids will be kids, and when they start acting up, there’s no harm in a little boogey man story to keep em’ line is there? Of course not…that is until the story becomes reality. Now Bill must find a way to keep The Man from stealing his boys or die trying.This was a bit longer, and really super eerie. I totally understand the boogey man stories parents tell their kids in order to get them to bed. They’re just scare tactics. When The Man became real, the panic in Bill’s actions was palpable, and his desperate need to protect what’s his is heartbreaking.

LUNCH BREAK: Mmmm nothing like a little good lunch break before a hard days work….HA once again…I did not see that coming. 

WITHIN THE CLOSET: “There’s something under my bed!” “There’s a monster in my closet!” Any human on the planet has heard these phrases squealed from the mouths of terrified children trying to fall asleep. Sometimes it’s a tactic just to sleep next to mom and dad, because lets face it, they;re the protectors. Nothing can happen to you when you are sleeping with mom and dad. Well poor Timmy is about to find out that when there’s something in the closet….it usually doesn’t stay there. This story scared even me a bit. Definitely got chills. Played out in my head like an Are You Afraid of the Dark episode and if you know me, that’s enough to make this a favorite. 

PIGGYBACK: A take on the classic Hit and Run Scenario, except our hero doesn’t run. Hank is just trying to keep a promise to his son. After the death of his wife, Hank’s boy depends on him being a part of his life, and Hank isn’t about to miss his son’s Birthday party no matter what. So when he hits something that scurries onto the road, Hank does the right thing and finds out that he has hit a man and instead of fleeing attempts to help the poor soul. What Hank doesn’t realize is that the man he has hit isn’t alone….I enjoyed this premise, this particular tale didn’t do too much for me but it is still a good read. Especially the Birthday party scene.

A LITTLE CRAZY: Willa is not having the best night. First off she’s on the run from her abusive husband and trying to make her flight out of the hell she believes she is in. While driving, the radio announcer explains that a fire broke out at the near by psychiatric hospital, releasing into the public several escaped mental patients. So naturally, when Willa swerves out of the way to avoid hitting a man in a hospital gown, her imagination gets the best of her and she runs terrified from the crash towards the first driver who will pick her up. Hitchhiking is never safe and made even more dangerous when there are crazies on the loose. Willa finds this out rather quickly, when the truck driver starts making her super uncomfortable. Escaping one stranger for another, Willa feels safer in the new stranger’s car, given that she is a little old lady, but Kurtz as wonderfully shown us in his writings….things are not always as they same. Loved this one! The reveals at the end could have read super campy but worked out perfectly! This was another good story to play the Who Done It game with!

TREELINE: Let’s just say, vegetarians will enjoy this little tale of revenge….Treeline has a good haunting feel to it. 

HOMECOMING: Thomas Godley wakes up in a crashed truck without any idea of how, where, or why he is there. After finding a wallet and confirming his own identity with the photo I.D., Tom stumbles from the wreck in search of anything or anyone familiar. Along his way, he finds a farmhouse and inside, his first encounter with less than normal circumstances. When the names Jenny and Rachel jump into his head, Tom is convinced these are names of people who he knows and loves and continues his search only to find a place late at night with children playing and reciting jumping rhymes. Something in the back of Tom’s mind is telling him this is wrong and to kill them all, but because of the crash he he has no idea why this is his first instinct…he soon finds out he should have listened to his gut. Absolutely wonderful take on the last man on earth concept. Had a strong I am Legend feel but with it’s own romance to it. I really liked this story.

FINGER CUFFS: Gene is not a good man. He is a very sick, perverted ass who preys on small children to satisfy his deranged desires. When riding around in his Pedo-Van,he spots two little girls selling lemonade, and as luck would have it, they are just his type. Gene tries his damndest to befriend the girls, orders their lemonade, drinks it, chats with them to gain their trust, and right when they are about to enter his van to see the “puppy”….everything goes black. I don’t want to give anymore away in this story! The way things play out in this story is fucking brilliant. There’s revenge, amputation, sacrifice, and a very unusual/uncomfortable breeding process. I loved the girls’s father soo much and Kurtz’s dialogue was perfection. Love, love, love, this one!

DEADLINE: It’s late, and Sydney is still at the office working into the night to finish the editing on a Halloween commercial. She’s all alone in the huge office building that was bought at a steal by Paul who owns Good Deal Television Advertising. Decades earlier, the building was once a Doctor’s office, so the old medical instruments strewn about in some of the rooms, doesn’t help help ease Sydney’s mind when she begins to hear strange noises and see the shadow of a bald man coming and going. Trying to stay calm, Sydney finds that she isn’t all alone in the building. There’s someone else…and Sydney has what it wants. Not the strongest story in the book, but very well written. I love that Kurtz eluded to SOMETHING about Sydney, but he doesn’t give it completely away until it’s time. 

Monkey’s Box of Horrors Vol. 1 is a completely satisfying collection. There’s something for everyone in this book, and I honestly wasn’t dissapointed with any of the stories as a whole. Matt Kurtz has a strong voice and I am looking forward to picking up a copy of MONKEY’S BUCKET OF HORROR VOL. 2 !!!

BUY THE BOOK HERE!!!! :

MONKEY’S BOX OF HORRORS VOL. 1

unnamedMEET THE AUTHOR: MATT KURTZ!!!! Matt Kurtz grew up as a monster kid of the ‘70s. His steady diet of spooks and ghouls consisted of Hammer horror and Amicus anthology films, Universal Monsters, Aurora monster model kits, Kolchak the Night Stalker, Fangoria Magazine, and Famous Monsters of Filmland. Ferociously consuming these monstrosities at such an early age, Matt quickly became terrified of the dark. It was while cowering under the covers at bedtime that his mind leaped into overdrive, creating scenarios of terror he’d eventually spew onto the page decades later. He is the author of the Monkey’s…Tales of Terror collections (Monkey’s Box of Horrors and Monkey’s Bucket of Horrors) and the forthcoming novel Kinfolk.

Kris Lugosi

Kris Lugosi is an honorary member of the Midnight Society, avid horror fan, horror convention nut, and voracious reader. Obsessed with the 80's B-movie horror genre and looking to introduce you to the seedy, underground world of horror and bizarre fiction.

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